Please Avert Your Eyes

So in the shower this morning I felt a bump on my boob. Of course I called my husband in to feel it, in which he had no trouble obliging. He felt the same thing and told me to get it checked out. I called the doctor to schedule an appointment. When they asked what it was for, the girl covered the receiver and yelled across the office to another woman in the background, "This girl found something on her breast and needs an exam. Should I do it today?" The unknown woman in the background said yes and told her that they only had an appointment 30 minutes from when I called. The girl got back on the phone with me very worried and told me to come in at that time. I was really not worried, and in no rush, but suddenly this girl had me thinking that I should be worried that my world is flipping upside down and I should just curl up in the fetal position and wait to die.

I get to the office and sign-in. I then begin to remember a bill from an appointment in June that my insurance doesn't cover completely. Oops. Luckily it was only $12. Anyway, the same girl that answered the phone reminds me and I pay it off. One stress off my back. I get called in to the office and ushered to the exam room where the nurse proceeds to try to sever my arm with the blood pressure cuff. (112/80 she tells me is good. Or maybe it was 120/80, I'm not sure but she tells me its good.) Then, the doctor comes in. I tell him the shower story and how I wasn't really looking for anything, my shower pouf just slipped an my fingers found the bump. (No, I was not feeling myself up as my wonderful husband insists.) Then the doc tells me to change into the wonderful gown with the back open. Lovely. When he comes back in he has me assume the position for the exam. It took everything I had to not laugh at the doctor. The whole time he was feeling around he was staring at the ceiling! To be honest, I was kinda insulted as my boobs are big and not so bad looking. Anyway, he felt what I felt and has me going to get my boobies squeezed by the mamogram machine and to get an ultrasound. My husband's friend sent him a picture of the ultrasound of her baby. I joked that I should post mine too.

Oh, and just so everyone knows, I'm not worried. This is small whatever it is and the doctor doesn't think its anything horrible. He agreed with me that it is just better to be safe. I go in Tuesday and will probably know by Wednesday. I'll keep everyone posted.